Signifying nothing

Friday,August 16,2002

Far out!

OK there is something cool about a group of guys who don Mexican wrestling (the only kind of pro wrestling worth its salt) masks and play in front of a stunned yuppie crowd at the Gallivan Center in good old Salt Lake City. At least somebody is finally getting brave in picking people for that series. Mostly it is yuppistically acceptable groups. Los Straightjackets. Out of sight.

Thursday,August 15,2002

White Goddess

You know I'm the kind of person who really doesn't notice stress until I'm on the other side of it. I say that because I now realize the stress of my work. Since I'm on vacation I don't have that sense of impending doom (OK that is an exaggerated way of describing it) that I usually have during the week. Exaggeration aside, I am feeling good just doing what I will and letting the wind take me there. I have been roundly criticized, however:

Wandering, not sleeping, rudderless, lack of focus gives one the opportunity to make connections one usually doesn't see. or one is just fucked up because one doesn't have enough to do.

Now granted from what I have written the past few days could be read as being rudderless. Aren't all quests at some time or another rudderless? Think of Odysseus. He was totally at the mercy of the Sea for most of his voyage yet still managed to find his way home.

Speaking of Odysseus I did a kind of re-enactment of Ulysses yesterday by wandering around town. Granted SLC is not Dublin, but it was just fun hitting some spots in town free of purpose and open to what was gong on. An initial intent was to go see one of the left over Olympic pyramidspainted by Jon Bean. Well way leading on to way I never did actually get down to it. I spent most of my time in Sam Weller's because they have are taking 20% off all used books. I found some interesting Robert Graves stuff (you know I, Claudius): Hebrew Myths, and The White Goddess. In both of these Graves explicates his pan-European theory that Western religions are much more closely linked than previously claimed, and that differentiation is a result of the insurgence of patriarchal modes of thinking. The male god usurps the goddess. While his theory in White Goddess is self-admitedly extreme ( "But it is onl,y fair to warn readers that this remains a very difficult book, as well as a very queer one, to be avoided by anyone with a distracted, tired or rigidly scientific mind...") it is fascinating to see how he draws various mythologies together, and how he unabashedly proclaimes in both texts that mythology is essential to understanding human behaviors and is not (as he derides in both texts) merely fanciful histories that were told so many times that they become distorted and magical. For Graves there is truth in the story, I suppose, without need for what one might call the refining glass of "reality." Graves takes a large swath of literature, from Rabbinic commentaries to Druid stories pased down into written language. Fascinating stuff.

Armed with my 7 books (I also bought a collection of essays by William Carlos Williams, and another by Wallace Stephens, a treatise on toleration by Voltaire, a small but amusing book on reading by Hugh Walpole, and an odd volume from the Works of James Russell Lowell with political and literary essay) I next went to the monthly pub crawl but was more entertained by my books than by people.

Wednesday,August 14,2002

Lothlorian

Here's some context:

From: "Clint Gardner" <sorry_no_email_available_due_to_spam_harvesters@diespamdie.com>
To: "Richelle"
Subject: Re: god bless mr. wilford brimley
Date: Sunday, August 11, 2002 10:21 AM

...Actually I am on vacation now and will probably take a break from that page as well. I've had the idea of sort of writing a medieval adventure story of these 9 days...you know something like Le Morte d'Athur or Beowulf. I had the idea while watching the Hobbit (you know that very bad but somehow good old Rankin Bass cartoon.) I was thinking it would be an interesting experience just to wander about and see what the Universe says.

A friend of mine went off to Vancouver a month or so ago and brought me back a rock. In a totally uncharacteristic move from my normal non-mystical self, I put it in my pocket as a sort of talisman before I walked up to the Smiss yesterday. When I was about done I mindlessly stopped by the magazine rack to see if there would be anything interesting (of course there wasn't and I knew there wouldn't be) and suddenly this guy said boldy and clearly as if he were talking to me something like "Shameless girl!" I had to physically turn to look and see that he was obviously looned out. I looked away immediately (you know like you would in any situation where the insane are roaming about), avoiding that eye contact that might suck me in. He then rambled on about women and something about work. I was too freaked out
to pay attention to any of the monologue.

Of course it wasn't until later that I realized that this could be considered one of those Homeric (for want of a better term) moments where the Universe is saying something. Perhaps my guide stone will lead me to Galadrial in Lothlorian after all.

Now what the fuck the universe is saying from such a babling idiot I have no idea. Well...it is as my wonder-site says "A tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury/Signifying nothing." But anyway I still think I will keep up my mini-adventure. Do you want to [be] a seer, guiding my path?

Dear god how fucking pretentious.

--Clint

PS hee this is getting dangerously weird. Next I'll be wearing black....

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Signifying nothing

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